What to Do If You Are Being Stalked: A Practical Guide

Understanding Stalking

Stalking is a pattern of unwanted and repeated contact, monitoring, or communication that causes fear, distress, or concern for safety. It is a serious criminal offence in the UK under the Protection from Harassment Act 1997 and the Stalking Protection Act 2019. It is also seriously underreported: many victims do not recognise what is happening to them as stalking, particularly when the perpetrator is someone they know, which is the case in the majority of stalking cases.

Common misconceptions include the idea that stalking is mostly committed by strangers or that it involves dramatic, overtly threatening behaviour. In reality, most stalking is committed by ex-partners, former friends, or people known to the victim, and the early behaviours can seem ambiguous: unwanted contact, turning up at places, gifts sent uninvited, monitoring social media. These early behaviours are nonetheless part of a pattern that can escalate to serious violence if not addressed.

Recognising Stalking Behaviours

Stalking behaviours include: repeatedly sending unwanted messages, emails, or gifts; following or monitoring your movements; turning up at your home, workplace, or places you frequent without invitation; monitoring your social media or online activity; making enquiries about you to friends, family, or colleagues; ordering things in your name or making contact with people in your life; damaging your property; and making threats, either explicit or implied.

The defining features are that the behaviour is repeated, is unwanted, and causes you fear or distress. A single unwanted encounter is not stalking. A pattern of repeated unwanted contact that causes you anxiety about your safety is.

Documentation: The Foundation of Your Response

Begin documenting everything immediately when you recognise a pattern of stalking behaviour. Keep a detailed log that records the date, time, location, and description of each incident, including how it made you feel and who else witnessed it. Screenshot messages, social media contact, and any online activity. Preserve voicemails and save any gifts or letters (handled minimally to preserve fingerprints).

This documentation serves two critical purposes. It builds the evidence of a pattern that distinguishes stalking from individual incidents. And it provides the evidential record that police, courts, and legal processes will rely on. Start a dedicated file and add to it consistently.

Reporting to Police

Report stalking to police at the earliest opportunity, ideally when a pattern becomes clear rather than waiting until behaviours escalate. Call 101 for non-emergency reporting and ask specifically to speak with the force's stalking or harassment lead if one exists. Provide your log and all documentation. If you are in immediate danger, call 999.

When reporting, be explicit that you are reporting stalking and use the word stalking rather than nuisance or harassment. This is not pedantic: it ensures your case is assessed under the correct legal framework with the appropriate seriousness.

If your initial report is not taken seriously, escalate. Ask to speak to a supervisor. Contact the Suzy Lamplugh Trust National Stalking Helpline (0808 802 0300) who can advise you on how to pursue your report and can sometimes advocate on your behalf with police.

Legal Protections

A Stalking Protection Order (SPO) is a civil order that can be applied for by police to restrict the stalker's behaviour. It can be applied for quickly, without a full criminal prosecution, and breaching it is a criminal offence. An SPO can prohibit contact, exclude the stalker from specified locations, and require them to attend a stalking intervention programme.

A non-molestation order or injunction can be obtained through family court for stalking by a current or former intimate partner, and provides legal protection with the backing of contempt of court proceedings for breach. A family law solicitor can advise on and apply for these orders, and in some cases legal aid is available.

Keeping Yourself Safe

Practical safety measures while being stalked include: varying your routes and routines so your movements are less predictable; reviewing what information about you is available online and on social media; increasing physical security at home including locks, security lights, and considering a CCTV doorbell; informing trusted people including your employer, friends, and family about the situation so they can be alert and report if the stalker contacts them; and considering whether to change your contact details, though this should be discussed with police as it may affect investigations.

Do not attempt to reason with or manage the stalker's behaviour by engaging with them. Any contact, even to say please leave me alone, is interpreted by most stalkers as a form of attention and can encourage continuation. A clear, single statement of non-contact (this is not something you may be comfortable making) followed by total non-engagement is the approach recommended by specialist stalking advocates.

Support

The Suzy Lamplugh Trust National Stalking Helpline (0808 802 0300) is the primary specialist support service for stalking victims in the UK. Paladin National Stalking Advocacy Service provides intensive casework support for high-risk stalking victims. Victim Support provides free, confidential support for all crime victims. In situations involving intimate partner stalking, Refuge and Women's Aid provide additional specialist support.